Incredible animation! More importantly, you've brought a lot of attention to Ebaums world and why nobody should trust it. Congratulations on getting your animation removed and bringing the issues to light!
Good luck in all future endevors, you are seriously talented!
Rather boring, but has great potential
Okay, first of all, let me say that I love your artwork, both the style and detail. Also, you've taken a large risk trying to use a game 5 million users wide and parody it.
Now that I've said that, let me just say that the movie didn't captivate me that much. Your art is good, keep that, however your jokes, and plot in general aren't very good (at least in my opinion). First of all, the plot is kinda there, but there isn't much glue holding it together. Things happen to the characters, but for the most part it's sporatic (for example, one of your characters is raised from the dead almost like a side thought. More character development would have really helped this part of the toon to have more depth/substance.) On the subject of character development, make your characters have distince and memorable personalities, that's part of what makes any toon good. It would have helped if you'd given a little better grounds for the gnome to abandon the warlock.
Okay, on to the subject of jokes. Here is where you have the most potential that I can see. Work on timing! That's half of what makes a joke funny. When doing a toon, you have to be very sudden to get the humurous surprise. Make sure you do that when people interrupt or something unexpected happens. Other jokes require a build up. Make sure that you don't just throw one in, plan it! Also, please stay away from overly cliche statements like "Don't tell me, you opened the book?". Instead go with something original or funny that people won't expect right off the bat. On that note, stay original at all costs (I'm not saying you weren't, I just like to say that). One last note jokes, you may want to try pairing jokes. An immeadiate extention or follow up on something humorous can work wonders.
Finally, see if you can exaggerate some of the voices more. I understand that this can be hard for a flash animator, but details can really help.
Overall, plenty of potential and looking forward to the next installment! Thanks for taking the time to read this legnthy revies (if you did, that is)
Well of course I read it, I read all reviews!
On character development:
Yah, this is something I've known would be a bit sacraficed from episode to episode. Hopefully, if you watch the series as a whole it seems more involved. There was quite a lot more stuff planned, but it was so long I had to start cutting back.
(And on a side note, I never felt that the "Don't tell me" line was the joke, but the "Why does everyone keep blaming me!?" part was)
at any rate, thanks for a timely review
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